Concerning the events of March 9th 2011.

I know what you are thinking.
Hey here's another close minded homer who wants to take big Z's massive head and stick it up on a pike.
Gee that's visceral.
I want to move away from the blood wrath and more to an open letter to the NHL.

Dear NHL,
So... You guys must think you are pretty funny.
I know it's only early March but this a pretty outrageous April fools joke.
Pissing off a bunch of bitter vengeful and pretty riot prone fans is a lot funnier than it sounds on paper.
I always knew you had that impish side Gary, and Colin whoah-oh! Way to get an alibi by having this stuff happen to your son's team. You really thought of everything! What's next? You guys going to release the hit out on DVD with comic book "Ka-pow!" captions right when Pacioretty's head makes contact with the stanchion? Boy you guys just kill me. At first I didn't think you had it in you, I mean when James Wisniewski got two games for pretending to give oral pleasure I really thought you were a bunch of stiffs. Since when is dick sucking not funny? Dick sucking is hilarious! I mean I laugh every time you guys get on your knees and satisfy the the four fans in Phoenix. It's a knee slapper! Which brings me to my next point, I am so glad you guys have finally sorted out your priorities. I'm sure somewhere in Pennsylvania Sidney Crosby is sitting down (because that nasty concussion sure makes it hard to stand up for long) and he is thinking "I am so happy Mr. Bettman is fighting hard to keep the health of sun belt hockey on dialysis, I'll just puke into this bucket for a little bit longer". I know a lot of people are not supporting your decision to not penalize Chara at all right now, but in time I think they will see it your way. The longterm health of a 23 year old should be compromised, I mean how else are we going to sell hockey to hotbeds like Oklahoma City and Las Vegas without our big lovable oaf Zdeno missing for 3 or 4 games. That would be the real tragedy here boys and girls! Well NHL I must be going, there seem to be some rowdy Canadiens supporters burning an effigy of a certain Slovkian defender and my dog has asthma so I will have to ask them stop. I just want you fine men to know that this is a step in the right direction to join that elite echelon of Sports Leagues like the National Lacrosse League, NFL Europe and of course, Slam Ball.
Sincerely yours,
E

Where's the WHA when you need it?

Attack of the Dawgs! Plus today's game preview.

If you told me that the top line in Montreal's WIN against the defending Cup Champions would be three Hamilton Bulldogs who were only called up yesterday, I would have assumed that you were starting to party for the Super Bowl a couple days early. Yes the trio of Ryan White, Brock Trotter and David Desharnais certainly stepped it up in the absence of Andrei Kostitsyn, Mike Cammalleri and Benoit Pouliot and will have to keep the energy going if we want to top the Bruins today at 3, who will be absolutely desperate for a win. Pleks, Gio and Scotty Gomez Adams all had huge games yesterday and will need to produce points consistently until the Olympic break There will be some sort of cruel sweetness if this win against the Bruins will push Pete Chiarelli to give Claude Julien the can, even though I do not think the B's struggles are his fault. I personally hope Claude can keep his job, as he is a very good coach and a good guy. I do hope that the Canadiens keep winning this key games while teams behind us like New York, Tampa and the Bruins continue to slide. There is an article out that theorizes that the Canadiens only need to go 12-10-1 in our remaining games to clinch a playoff spot. I think thats do-able. So enjoy the game, enjoy the football and enjoy those damn funny commericals. Let's hope we see some more Danica Patrick in compromising positions.

Peace true believers,

E

Canadiens 2 Bruins 1 SO Someone call Bob Barker...

BECAUSE THE PRICE IS ONCE AGAIN RIGHT!

Carey sez: What? Those idiots in Montreal are blaming ME for Bergeron's goal? Like it's bad enough Zdeno Chara sits on me, are the Bruins that desperate for offense that they think lifting the net up and putting it under will fool the refs.

I'm like a freaking half native Rodney Dangerfield, I get less respect than Jon Fucking Gosselin. And that guy's more of a douche than Bertrand Raymond and Darren Dreger put together. I guys people are going to say that Im off the Vodka Bottle or something, or hey, maybe make a joke about me and underage girls on St. Lawrence on Saturday Nights, I can take it. So what if I speak with the emotion of Ben Stein on Valium, I'm back baby, and there's not a god damn thing those Bloodthirsty Jackals can do about it.

Suck it Petit Tigre.

Just thought you would appreciate that.

Peace

E

BROONS vs Canadiens. Somethings gotta give.

Tonight les Habbies look to add to the Bostn Bruins losing streak when the two original six teams clash on Thursday Night Hockey.

The Canadiens have been violated in the butt by injuries lately, and they will suit up tonight with Ryan White and Tom Pyatt will make their Canadiens' debut tonight while Brian Gionta is a game time decision. Carey Price will get another chance for a win tonight after being thrown to the (former Chiacgo) wolves Tuesday night versus the Thrashers. The Bruins will be without the services of David Krejci tonight, as he has swine. HAHA.

A big effort is needed tonight.

Aouais les boys,

Peace

E

Playoff Roundup Day 5

So injury update:  Andrei Markov and Robert Lang skated in full equipment alone today and passed the puck around.  Word is that they will only play once they have skated with the team.  

Big Ups to the Arabian Avenger for the tip.

So roundup.

• The Flyers bounce back at home with a sound 6-3 wins against Pittsburgh.  Simon Gagne pots the Short Handed Game Winner. Series is now 2-1.
• The Canucks take a stranglehold on their series with a 3-2 win in St. Lou. Bobby Luongo looks like a demi-god in tacky blue and green uniforms.
• Jersey takes a 2-1 series lead with 3-2 Overtime win. Travis Zajac with the winna.
• Jonas Hiller is the suprise star of these young playoffs making 40 saves ina  3-2 win and taking a 2-0 series lead over the President Trphy winner Sharks.

Game 3 tonight.

This could be it, either we win and this really become a series, or we get crushed and call it a year.

Pray.

Pray your little asses off.

Seriouslay...

Peace True Believers,

E

Playoff Roundup Day 3

Okay before I start with the round-up just thought you should click this link.

Yes, Mike Komisarek "faced raped" Matt Hunwick so much that his spleen burst.

Way to be Mikey.

Anyway ROUND UP.

• Hurricanes bounce back after an embarrassing Game One loss and win 2-1 in Overtime in the New Jersey Swamp. TIMMMAAAY Gleason with the winner.
• The battle of Pennsylvania rages on with a 3-2 instant classic in the Steel City.  Billy Guerin (GOD YOU COULD HAVE BEEN A HAB) scores the overtime winner.
• Finaaaaalllyyy, Bobby Lu shows why he's one of the best 'tenders in the world with a 3-0 blank out of the St. Louis Blues. Everyone who has him in their playoff pool must be having multiples right now.

Habs game tonight at the classic 8 PM start.

If we want to win this series' we're going to need a lot more of the Bruins to be rushed to the Hospital.

But seriously, get well Matt Hunwick, you may be a Bruin, but you're a solid hockey player and a good ol' Michigan Wolverine.  On a random note, the Wolverines have supposedly recruited Duke Point Guard Greg Paulus to try out for their starting QB job.

Yes you heard me right.

Point Guard, Quarter Back, I am aware they are two different sports.

Check the link: HERE.

Peace True Believers,

E