Monday, November 30, 2009

Too many men fail LOL

I'm not an English Teacher, but I'm pretty sure this is Irony at it's simplest form.
Anyway not much going on on the Canadiens front, so this is all that is going on right now.
Fun game, nice to see that there will be a Parade this year.
But until the Canadiens take that faithful drive down Ste. Catharines, it is still a hollow victory.
Great job Als and whoever that guy in locker room whose towel fell off, please, there are children watching.
Peace, and go Als

Saturday, November 28, 2009


Give kudos to the Canadiens, who many thought were going to be beaten worse than Tiger was by his wife.
Low blow.
I know.
Even though we did not get the extra point, I am very happy with this team's effort. We are playing without Gomez, without Gionta, without both Andreis, without Gill and without Benny Poo (My new name for Pouliot). Somehow we were able to get a point against the best team in the Eastern Conference.
I have a new name for Tomas Plekanec, taking in the facts that he plays a hard nosed, never say die game, and that he used to be a pansy his new nickname is Scrappy Coco from the classic You Don't Mess with the Zohan.
Disco and Hummus jokes to come.
Take this loss as a partial victory my friends.
Cheer on the Als tomorrow, Montreal needs at least one team to win a championships this year.
And no, the Impact do not fucking count.
Damn Europeans...
Peace True Believers,

Game Preview: Hockey Night in the AHL!

That is a reference to the fact that Pyatt, White, Wyman and company have played more games here this season than Hamilton.
The game tonight against the Washington Capitals will be an intresting, because it will be interesting to see if we can stay in the game for a full 60 minutes.
It will be interesting to see if the probable returns of Spacek and D'Agostini will help boost the teams morale.
It will be interesting to see if the Gorges Cammalleri scrap sparks those two to do something special.
Aaaand finally, it will be interesting to see if Alex the Gr8 gets the better of Carey Price, or will the Canadien Cowboy get the last laugh.
All of these questions, and more will be answered.
I've always wanted to say that.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Entertaining Game. Habs top Jackets 5-3.

The first game of the A.G. era (After Gui!) era started off with a win, Carey Price made some show stopping saves, Tommy Boy Plekanec continues to rack up nthe points, and Sergei Kostitsyn a.k.a The Scarecrow (If he only had brain...) made a genereally triumphant return to the Bell Centre, playing hard nosed and setting up Maxim Lapierre's insurance marker in the third period.
Is it just me, or did that shot kind of represent Mad Max firing all of his frustration and futility plus a little bit of his buddy Gui's topless magazine spread into the net? I dunno if that's too deep for some Hab fans, but I think it sounds good.
We are now one game above five hundred for the first time in god knows how long.
Woohoo! We're #10! We're #10!
The Canadiens now get to take on the top two teams in conference as they head to steel town tonight and then head back home to host the Caps on Saturday. Washington will be looking for revenge after dropping a tight one last Friday.
Aha, dropping a tight one.
You readers are slow lucky that you are reading the blog from one of Montreal's true sport intelligentsia.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Start of a new era???

Probably not.
But a win would be nice.
Some game notes close to puck drop, J.T. Wyman has been called up to the big club and will play in the suspended Georges Laraque's place on the fourth line tonight along with Kyle Chipcura and the newly called up Sergei Tit'syn.
Game on!

Monday, November 23, 2009

The death of Gui!

Your nips might get a lil' cold in Minny bud.
Well Bob Gainey took his in house cleaning to a new step trading disgruntled fan favorite Guillame Latendresse to the Minnesota Wild for hulking underachiever Benoit Pouliot.
Pouliot was selected 4th overall in 2005, just a spot ahead of Carey Price.
Imagine the nightmare if we had the chance to draft him. Ugh.
Pouliot has been considered one of the bigger draft busts of the last 10 years, just a little less than the great Patrik Stefan. He has been in and out of the minor leagues and has a mere four points in his first fourteen games of the season which would be alright, if he wasn't chosen only three spots after Sidney Crosby...
Benoit Pouliot is not the answer, he might just be another problem, but you have to hope a change of scenery can do well for him.
Meanwhile Gui, I do not put you at fault for your issues. When you have 23,000 Neanderthals chanting your name as an eighteen year old in the PRESEASON, and the team decided to bypass letting you evolve fully in junior and the AHL, it's hard not to have a little bit of on ice issues.
Hopefully you hit your stride in Minnesota and this trade was what you needed. Happy trails my man.
Oh and uh Benny...
Welcome to the fucking jungle.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Half n' Half Review & Preview.

So since there is another Canadiens game tonight, I am going to tee up that game as well as talk about yesterday's nail biter in the nation's capital. The Canadiens played scrappy last night, and played maybe 45 minutes of good hockey but the Capitals then took complete control and led an all out offensive where they were able to get one goal on a Brendan Morrison rebound. Kudos is due to Jaroslav Spacek and Roman Hamrlik who have stepped up incredibly since Andrei Markov's crippling injury. Carey Price continues to show all the haters why they should not be talking about Hockey with his inspired play and Tomas "Transamerica" Plekanec has shown that even someone who just underwent a sex change can be a man.
The Habs take on the Red Wings tonight, who just suffered a 2-1 Overtime loss versus the Florida Panthers last night. They will be out for blood and I beg of you Canadiens. DO NOT take this Detroit team lightly. They still have the all-world talent of Zetterberg, Datsyuk and Lidstrom out for them. They still are the reigning Western Conference Champions and 2008 Stanley Cup Champions, they can still come out and beat a team 5-0. I assume Jaroslav Halak will be starting tonight, so he has to get out to a good start and not let his long break come back to hurt him.
Get ready boys n' gals, the Habbies are playing well. But they have to take the next step.
Peace True Believers,

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Shoot Out Merk. Canes 2 Habs 3

Can people please stop being douches to Carey Price. It's bad enough he has the Canadiens playing in front of him.
Yes, I know, I'm fucking witty.
Seriously though, how long before the idiots in this town accept Mr. Price, how long before they realize that your career will not be over just because you give up 6 goals one game.
Did anyone else feel inspired after that second to last save in the shoot out, where after pulling his glove back, Price puffed his chest out like a prizefighter almost saying to the Bell Centre crowd "Are you not entertained?!?!"
This is the Price we wanted to see. Hopefully it stays this way for a while.
Some notes about the team, Gionta is out indefinitely with a broken bone in his foot, while O'Byrne and Laraque are set to make their returns in the next few games.

Sunday, November 15, 2009


You have got to be fucking kidding me.
53 saves and the team in front of him decides to not play.
The guy who has been crapped on all season, when he has not deserved it, makes half a century of saves in one game. And because of the team in front of him, he loses. This is the angriest I have ever been as a Canadiens Fan.
You better score 5 goals next game. Because no one deserves what Carey Price just went through.
Tonight actually made me sick.
If I can say anything positive, it is that I want to extend my sincere apologies to Carey.
If you are somehow reading this, I want to tell you that I have supported you since day one. Every time someone has criticized you, or bitch about not drafting Anze Kopitar instead just because to start the season he is leading the league in scoring (news flash Jack Todd, before you put out an article about how we'd be better off with Kopitar, consider that last year Aaron fucking Voros was leading the league in scoring a month in) I would always tell them that you have the potential to be a star. And if tonight was a demonstration of that, then you have a hell of future. But it seems that the team in front of you, much like the fans in this god forsaken town like seeing brilliant potential fizzle and burn in front of their eyes. I don't know why Hockey Schadenfreude gets Montrealers off this much, but I look on these people with the utmost disdain.
There is some tragedy that in reality, if Carey Price was in any American market right now, he would have been nurtured and brought up correctly and not have to make 53 saves in a losing effort. The problem is not him, the problem is not even Bob Gainey, who by the way Eklund, is not "too old school for today's NHL". Is it old fashioned to believe that the basis of a successful team is Goaltending and to draft a guy who turns out to win in every Junior level? Is it old school to believe that it's better to sign character locker room guys who can play 82 games rather to hang on to older wishy washy veterans who need three game vacations to regain their scoring touch? It't not that we were better off with Kovalev and Koivu, it's the fact that we are so snobby as hockey fans that we believe that anyone who has played more than a season with our "storied" franchise must be good. So we berate Gainey for getting rid of Begin, Bouillon and Dandenault who overall were USELESS for out hockey club, and criticize initially the acquisitions of Mara, Metropolit and our new top line, even though they bring a good presence to our team without any negative after taste.
The problem with our team, is the fans and media. That's right.
How is this team going to grow if every time we hit a road bump, which news flash, EVERY TEAM DOES, Pittsburgh DID fire their coach the year they won the cup, instead of supporting the team and finding positives to build on, the fans and columnists call for an upheaval just because somehow they expected 82 victories this season.
This team will not change for the better until the viewers change for the better. Will that ever happen?
Who knows...
Peace true believers (If they are truly any out there)

Friday, November 13, 2009

Party in the desert. Habs 4 Coyotes 2

Carey seems to like it.
This was a game that took me by surprise. The Canadiens won. Strange. The Canadiens won in regulation. Weirder. The Canadiens won in regulation, scoring 4 goals and getting a solid effort from the Goaltender... Where the hell am I? 1979?
I have to praise the work of Tomas Plekanec, who has officially completed the gender transformation process that was publicized by Chaz Bono recently, and has been playing like a man. Although Queen MAB skates less smoothly than Michael J Fox on a bad day and plays worse Defense than the French Army, gotta give him props for ONE HELL of a snipe.
You have to feel bad for Carey Price, time after time getting awful bounces, including the first goal of the night by Robert Lang where Carey was tomahawked in the neck by Paul Mara and fell to the ground.
Jaro Spacek left the game last night and did not return, if this is serious, it will be 4 out of or 7 starting Defenceman out with injury.
Well we still got some hope, Coach Obrand says hi.
Peace True Believers,

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Coyotes Habs... Come on......

Could not score a friggin goal.
Well maybe 12 months ago a game against the lowly Phoenix Coyotes would have been a breath of fresh air, but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
They have to learn how to play hockey all of a sudden.
This team.... I need a drink.
Coach Martin will name his starter later today, and really it is not going to matter if the Offense does not show up.
Say some yiddish prayers for the Canadiens.
We need a win.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Flames vs. Canadiens Our saviour has truly arrived.

Make Way! The Newest Canadien is the second coming of Butch Bouchard, a rock on the blue line that will put us over the top.
Ladies and Gentlemen...
Just thought we need some humor.
This team is incredibly different from the squad we were looking at before the season opener against Toronto Maple Leafs. We've called up alot of Bulldogs and signed a couple people who probably would not have been signed had we not faced some injury issues.
Halak will get the start tonight, and we should all distinguish the difference between Jaro Halak, who is a hard working Goalie just trying to win, and his slime ball piece of dung agent Allan Walsh. Because as much as I do not think Carey Price is playing well, I am genuinely disgusted in Walsh's comments as taking a cheap shot at a 22 year old and then denying the statements later by deleting the quote from his twitter.
Anyway enough about steaming pieces of crap.
Andrei Kostitsyn will be starting on the first line tonight, team leading scorers Plekanec and Cammalleri will play together on the second line with Max Lapierre, and new addition Jay Leach will start on the third pairing with Queen MAB. He hopes to be a non factor in the sense that he does not want to make a negative imprint on the team. If only Marc Andre thought the same way...
Last but not least, I want to commend Mike Cammalleri for his for program "Cammy' Heroes" supporting the troops. Whether troops should or should not be in Afghanistan right now, I am one of the strongest supporters of our troops in all their endeavors.
Enjoy the game tonight, and the special centennial jerseys that do not give you screaming migraines.
Peace True Believers,

Friday, November 6, 2009

Canadiens 2 Bruins 1 SO Someone call Bob Barker...


Carey sez: What? Those idiots in Montreal are blaming ME for Bergeron's goal? Like it's bad enough Zdeno Chara sits on me, are the Bruins that desperate for offense that they think lifting the net up and putting it under will fool the refs.
I'm like a freaking half native Rodney Dangerfield, I get less respect than Jon Fucking Gosselin. And that guy's more of a douche than Bertrand Raymond and Darren Dreger put together. I guys people are going to say that Im off the Vodka Bottle or something, or hey, maybe make a joke about me and underage girls on St. Lawrence on Saturday Nights, I can take it. So what if I speak with the emotion of Ben Stein on Valium, I'm back baby, and there's not a god damn thing those Bloodthirsty Jackals can do about it.
Suck it Petit Tigre.

Just thought you would appreciate that.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

BROONS vs Canadiens. Somethings gotta give.

Tonight les Habbies look to add to the Bostn Bruins losing streak when the two original six teams clash on Thursday Night Hockey.
The Canadiens have been violated in the butt by injuries lately, and they will suit up tonight with Ryan White and Tom Pyatt will make their Canadiens' debut tonight while Brian Gionta is a game time decision. Carey Price will get another chance for a win tonight after being thrown to the (former Chiacgo) wolves Tuesday night versus the Thrashers. The Bruins will be without the services of David Krejci tonight, as he has swine. HAHA.
A big effort is needed tonight.
Aouais les boys,

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Hung up to dry. Thrashers 5 Canadiens 4

Really a frustrating game, no matter what you think of this team, anyone who believes that Carey Price did not play well is just wrong. He has been bad these last two years. Very bad, but last night was not one of those nights. Besides the knuckler from Mark Popovic that somehow found the back of the net, the Thrashers goals were products of a collapsed and ineffective D corps for Montreal. Brian Gionta missed practice today, Hal Gill will be out 3 weeks, and we have called up Ryan White and Tom Pyatt from Hamilton.
Safe to say a win against the Broons would be a serious kick in the ass for our morale.
But if my mother had balls she would be my father, who happened to make very good banana cake.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Game Preview Thrashers vs. Habs

The Canadiens are finally back in action tonight as they take on the Atlanta Thrashers at 7:30. La Tricolore have been terrific at home, where they have won 5 straight in the friendly confines of the Bell Centre and tonight Carey Price hopes to get back in the saddle and finally gain some momentum.
If I am Management I will watch this game and not look at whether Carey wins or loses to decide if he plays against the Bruins on Thursday, but rather look at whether he plays with confidence and poise.
Enjoy the game lads and lassies, and say some sort of tribal healing prayer for our depleted blue line, as we have lost yet another D Man to injury, as Hal Gill is out indefinitely. Mathieu Carle will take his place and will definitely get some decent playing time tonight, as he is the only right handed shot on our back end.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Gross but okay... Habs 5 Leafs 4 OT

Happy post Halloween morning boys and girls.
I hope you all said BOO last night when Mike Komisarek returned to the Bell Centre.
Another awful awful win last night that ended up with two points. Just another indication of what this season will look like. Once again I was more than disappointed that Carey Price did not play tonight, I feel that this was a great chance to regain his confidence, instead he is benched AGAIN after a loss where he did everything imaginable to win that game when the team in front of him was sub par. I well fought game against Chicago could have sparked Price to a decisive, regulation win last night against Toronto, shut the door against Atlanta on Tuesday, and maybe start and incredible streak. Instead he will start from scratch again with no possible momentum.
My one problem with this team, other than that, everything is expected.
Peace True Believers,